Attitude - Replies to posts in threads - Don't Worry, Be Happy!

[IEGeek]

I know that I am a relatively new user to the Cove and it appears that I submit mostly jokes and half hearted attempts at humor in most threads, however I have been reading thread after thread where folks are getting downright upset at something someone wrote. For example, someone asks for help and gets beat to no end because others thought they did not ask correctly. Others voice concerns over an issue or current event and someone gets upset becuase it does not mesh with their opinions or views, etc etc etc etc (or in the illustrious words of Elaine - YADA YADA YADA) Then Marc or Wes or someone has to jump in and provide the equivalent of a "go to your room" I am sure they would both rather be discussing the current events in the world of Quality and other interesting topics.

This reminds me of folks that get upset because of the shows on F/X that are considered inappropriate (language, nudity, violence, drug use etc) they boycott the advertisers, they write letters to the editor, they do all sorts of things. Here is what they do not do, CHANGE THE CHANNEL!!!! When Howard Stern first took to the airwaves in NY, people were outraged. In a poll by NBC Radio, they found that those who hated the show listened longer than those who enjoyed the show. Why? To see what he would do next. When Larry Flynt first started his now-famous publication, people were flabbergasted. Jerry Springer (he was mayor of Cincy at this time) threw a fund raiser to get legal fees to stop the publication. They picketed Flynt's offices, they set his car on fire, they even shot him causing paralysis. When he poked fun at Jerry Falwell (sp?) they shunned him from social circles, they found an employee list and starting holding prayer meetings in their front yards. Yet during all this his magazine grew by 560% in 4 years. We all wish our businesses would grow like that. That all being said....

Your beliefs, your values, your morals -- they are YOURS. Nobody can take them away from you. Especially someone who you may not even know personally, they are only an icon on your screen. I happen to enjoy a difference of opinion as I enjoy debate in a professional manner. "I may not agree with what you are saying, but I will fight to the death for your ability to say it."(I need some help on who actually said this)

Not being one to identify an issue or concern and provide no valuable feedback or brainstorm on a solution, here is my proposal...

Next time you are offended by what someone writes, STOP-- THINK-- then type. Formulate a response then use the "PREVIEW POST" and read it back to yourself out loud. If you would send your response to your mother, then hit submit. If not, sit on it for a day, then reread it aloud. I have often times shot from the hip and regretted my response later. Whether it be via email, on here, or with my wife. After my heart attack last year, I have a whole new approach. Enjoy life, eat grapes in the setting sun, stop and smell the roses, pick a saying and it applies here.

I do not post this to get on a soapbox or "preach", I would just like to see more people use this valuable resource in the manner in which it was intended. I realize that I am only speaking to approximately 2% of the users on here, however it just seems that more get involved, then more then it is a mob mentality. For the remaining 98% who provide advice, insight and technical guidance.......

THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU

[jaimezepeda]

Originally Posted by IEGeek

When Howard Stern first took to the airwaves in NY, people were outraged. In a poll by NBC Radio, they found that those who hated the show listened longer than those who enjoyed the show. Why? To see what he would do next.

I don't mean to take away from what IEGeek has posted but the same is true of the opposite end of the "offensive" spectrum. Similar polls regarding Rush Limbaugh's talk radio show have yielded the same result.

Kinda makes you go "Hmmmmm!!!"

Jaime

[Randy]

Essentially we try to mediate and keep the place on track. Folks are definitely allowed dissenting opinion here, but we strive to maintain civility and decorum so the Cove doesn't turn into just another crappy web site. For the most part politics, religion and ethnic issues we discusss are kept within an extremely narrow bandwidth because that is not what we're about and that's where problems begin. In all cases because this is a "private" site the "Boss" (a very ugly guy named Marc) prevails and he uses the Moderators (guys like me and Claes and Atul, and Carol, etc...) to maintain the place in his stead. Each of us may have stepped across the "line" on occasion (with the exception of me because I would never do that) and has had to be spanked...that's part of the fun. In all cases if you think something may be too cotroversial contact a Moderator and just ask.

[Wes Bucey]

Originally Posted by IEGeek

Next time you are offended by what someone writes, STOP-- THINK-- then type. Formulate a response then use the "PREVIEW POST" and read it back to yourself out loud. If you would send your response to your mother, then hit submit. If not, sit on it for a day, then reread it aloud. I have often times shot from the hip and regretted my response later. Whether it be via email, on here, or with my wife. After my heart attack last year, I have a whole new approach. Enjoy life, eat grapes in the setting sun, stop and smell the roses, pick a saying and it applies here.

Good advice for any occasion. My mom once gave me a plaque I kept prominently displayed in my office for years:
"Put brain in gear before putting mouth in motion."

I think I'll get a new one made, since I lost the original in one of my many moves.

Thanks for the happy memory. I'm glad I didn't have to experience a heart attack to recall it.

[Al Dyer]

I'm glad I never crossed the line and had to be chastized!


Good comments!

Al...

[Marc]

Also see: Responding to Questions by 'Newbies': Attitude and Intimidation

Few 'regulars' here are 'innocent' of having spoken too fast. I know I have many, many times so I'm as 'guilty' as anyone, if not more so. But - Taken as a whole, I think we've all done quite well over over the years. A few 'bumps' here and there. Taken as a whole, I think the forum is going along quite well right now.