posted 17 December 1999 09:49 AM               

Twas The Night Before Y2K

'Twas the night before Y2K,
And all through the nation
We awaited The Bug,
The Millennium sensation.

The chips were replaced
In computers with care,
In hopes that ol' Bugsy
Wouldn't stop there.

While some folks did drink
And were snug in their beds
Most others had visions
Of dread in their heads.

And Ma with her WinTel,
And I with my Mac
Had just safely logged off
To kick back a snack.

When o'er at the server,
There arose such a clatter
I called Mister Gates
To see what was the matter.

But dial-tone was missing,
So I flew like a flash
Off to my bank
To withdraw all my cash.

When what with my wandering eyes
Should appear?
My once trusty old Mac
As sick as I feared.

The Mother of all hacks,
It installed there so smug,
I knew that it must be
The Y2K Bug!

His image downloaded
In no time at all,
He whistled and shouted,
Let all systems fall!

No Intel! No Gateway!
Now HP! Big Blue!
Everything Compaq,
And Pentium too!

All processors big,
All processors small,
Crash away! Crash away!
Crash away all!

All the controls
That planes need for their flights
All microwaves, trains
And all traffic lights.

As I drew in my breath
And was turning around,
Out through the modem,
He came with a bound.

He was covered with fur,
And slung on his back
Was a sackful of virus,
Set for attack.

His eyes-how they twinkled!
His dimples-how merry!
As midnight approached, though
Things soon became scary.

He had a broad little face
And a satanic round belly,
And his sack filled with virus
That pulsated like jelly.

He was chubby and plump,
Perpetually grinning,
And I gasped when I saw him
As my hard drive stopped spinning.

A wink of his eye,
And a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know
Deeper feelings of dread.

He spoke not a word,
But went straight to his work,
He changed all the clocks,
Then turned with a jerk.

With a twitch of his nose,
And a quick little wink,
All things electronic
Soon went on the blink.

He zoomed from my system,
To the next folks downline,
He caused such a disruption,
Could this be a sign?