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A little perspective... The Goodbye Letter

M

morgand - 2006

#1
The Goodbye Letter


A father passing by his son's bedroom was astonished to see the bed was nicely made, and everything was picked up. Then, he saw an envelope, propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed, "Dad." With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter, with trembling hands.


Dear Dad,

It is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing you. I had to elope with my new girlfriend, because I wanted to avoid a scene with Mom and you.

I've been finding real passion with Stacy, and she is so nice, but I knew you would not approve of her, because of all her piercings, tattoos, her skin-tight motorcycle clothes, and because she is so much older than I am. But it's not only the passion... Dad she's pregnant.

Stacy said that we will be very happy. She owns a tiny trailer in
the woods, and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter.
We share a dream of having many more children.

Stacy has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't
really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it for ourselves, and trading
it with the other people in the commune, for all the cocaine
and ecstasy we want.

In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for
AIDS, so Stacy can get better. She sure deserves it!!

Don't worry Dad, I'm 15, and I know how to take care of myself.

You taught me well. Someday, I'm sure we'll be back to visit, so
you can get to know your grandchildren.

Love,

Your son,

John


P.S. Dad, None of the above is true. I'm over at Tommy's house.
I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life
than the report card that's in my center desk drawer. I love you!

P.S.S. Call when it is safe for me to come home
 
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Steve McQuality

Quality Engineer
#4
Claes:

I'm not sure I like that letter... Today is "Report Card Day" for my two twin daughters (it's the end of their school year). Thank GOD they're only 10!!!! :truce:

...and the advantage to living in the US - I hunt, so I own a shot gun (for the later years when the boys start coming by the house)...;)
 

Wes Bucey

Prophet of Profit
#5
Steve McQuality said:
Claes:

I'm not sure I like that letter... Today is "Report Card Day" for my two twin daughters (it's the end of their school year). Thank GOD they're only 10!!!! :truce:

...and the advantage to living in the US - I hunt, so I own a shot gun (for the later years when the boys start coming by the house)...;)
When my daughters were still living home and dating, one came home with her date about 10:30 pm to find me sitting on the front porch with a shotgun. I had been cleaning it outside to keep the odors out of the house.

She said, "Hi, Dad."

The date was rattled and blurted, "Gee! Mr. Bucey, we just went to the movie. Nothing happened. Honest!"

I bit the inside of my cheek and said in my most serious voice, "All right. Just don't give me any excuses."

The look on the date's face was precious, until my daughter broke the spell, "Oh, don't pay any attention to Dad; he's always joking around!"

Then she turned to me and harumphed, "Really, Dad. Sometimes you're just too much!"
 
#6
Steve McQuality said:
I hunt, so I own a shot gun (for the later years when the boys start coming by the house)...;)
Er... Any chance of you letting me borrow that barker? My daughter will be 11 in July, and my crystal ball tells me that I may need some deterrent pretty soon. (Be afraid, lads.... Be very afraid...:nono: )

Wes Bucey said:
Then she turned to me and harumphed, "Really, Dad. Sometimes you're just too much!"
LMAO! :lmao: Oh, that poor lad.... Why don't we have things like that on film?

/Claes
 

Steve McQuality

Quality Engineer
#7
Wes Bucey said:
When my daughters were still living home and dating, one came home with her date about 10:30 pm to find me sitting on the front porch with a shotgun. I had been cleaning it outside to keep the odors out of the house.

She said, "Hi, Dad."

The date was rattled and blurted, "Gee! Mr. Bucey, we just went to the movie. Nothing happened. Honest!"

I bit the inside of my cheek and said in my most serious voice, "All right. Just don't give me any excuses."

The look on the date's face was precious, until my daughter broke the spell, "Oh, don't pay any attention to Dad; he's always joking around!"

Then she turned to me and harumphed, "Really, Dad. Sometimes you're just too much!"
That's too funny!:lol: My Brother-in-law tells a very similar story, almost word for word when his daughters were in High School - only his "keep the date honest shotgun cleaning" happened as her date was picking her up to go out. I'm just patiently awaiting my opportunity to "have the same fun" as you two have had...
 

Steve McQuality

Quality Engineer
#8
Claes Gefvenberg said:
Er... Any chance of you letting me borrow that barker? My daughter will be 11 in July, and my crystal ball tells me that I may need some deterrent pretty soon. (Be afraid, lads.... Be very afraid...:nono: )

/Claes
...Sounds like our daughters are only 2 months apart in age (mine turn 11 in September). Give me a call in 5 years and at least we'll be able to sail in the same boat! At least you only have one - I've got TWINS! ...Guess I'll have to go out an buy a "Double Barrel Shotgun"...;)
 

Wes Bucey

Prophet of Profit
#10
Postscript

The guy that daughter eventually married (not the same date!) now has ALL my guns down in Texas where they still get lots of use with an avid hunter/fisher son-in-law.
 
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