I think we would fall into the "tiny" category.
Yes, that's small. And yes, of course people have other responsibilities. Again, that's normal in small business. And I doubt any organisation could afford/justify a full time systems person until they were at least 8 to 10 times that size or more. I prefer though having the responsiblities distributed, rather than vested in one person.
But it's still more than possible to have very skinny and highly functional ISO 9001-compliant systems in small businesses. I've done it, and more than a couple of times. Not saying that to boast, simply statement of fact. It can be done. And in a small business, it's very important to have it skinny. Otherwise, as you have found, it's a pain in the rear. Actually, I prefer ALL systems to be as skinny as possible, larger organisations too.
But please don't lay blame where it doesn't belong. That pain you're feeling is
not, not, not the fault of 'ISO' (they just produce the Standards), nor is it the fault of ISO 9001 (a specific standard). At all.
Indeed, the Standard itself has some relevant things to say, including in 0.1 (my bold added):
The design and implementation of an organization's quality management system is influenced by
a) its organizational environment, changes in that environment, and the risks associated with that environment,
b) its varying needs,
c) its particular objectives,
d) the products it provides,
e) the processes it employs,
f) its size and organizational structure.
It is not the intent of this International Standard to imply uniformity in the structure of quality management systems or uniformity of documentation.
Alas, too many people either don't read that or don't understand it.
The problem lies elsewhere, as you've said:
Our top management(who are 200 miles away) are a bunch of ^&%&^%&^%&^%&^%&^%&^%&^%&^%&^%'ers( use lots of nasty words <( ;..; )> ). They simply ignore our requests/suggestions/proof of optimal solutions to problems and say thank you. Then just never speak of it again.
I'm sorry to hear this. They are failing in their responsibility. Perhaps they're doing the 'letter of the Standard' but they're certainly failing to harness its true power and do it in a way that's productive for the whole organisation, including one of its basic principles: involving people.
Again, I'm sorry to hear that and I feel for you. But it would be much more accurate to vent your frustration on
the way that ISO 9001 has been done in your business and
not on ISO 9001 or ISO.