Friends, I'm going to share something very personal with you because I need your prayers and help. My oldest daughter is in a trauma ICU in Dallas with a severe head injury she received from falling out of a truck this past weekend. Although she is now conscious, the road to recovery will be long and we don't know the full extent of her loss or prognosis for cognitive recovery. She is living in the past and is not processing anything that is said to her. Your prayers are needed.
To make matters worse, it is her boyfriend who "assisted" her fall from the truck but no charges have been filed because my daughter is unable to give a statement. I've been told that "the case is closed". No, it is not possible that it was an accident or intentional on her part. There is a history that I won't go into here, and the circumstances and his immediate behaviour afterwards don't add up.
And he has now made a case with the hospital that he is next of kin due to his declaration that he is her common-law husband (this is not true but the hospital is accepting it on word only). I not only cannot bar his visitation, but have no say in her medical treatment or movement to rehab facility. I've spoken to an attorney but he seems to be a wimp and I don't think he can get the job done, which is to achieve guardianship of my daughter and a protective order against the boyfriend. I also need the "accident" fully investigated to ensure that this boy is brought to justice.
Anyone with police or legal connections who can provide direction on the best course to follow, please contact me. Messages can be left at 800-908-7653, ext. 270 and I'll get back to you ASAP.
Sorry to be so blunt , but desperate times call for desperate measures. Thank you and God Bless.
My sister Pam was in an accident when she was 22 (almost 40 years ago). Comatose for several months (not expected to live, Pam was in Atlanta's Grady memorial as I remember), she had a husband who proceeded to 'hit the road' not to be found for a number of years. In fairness although her husband was a bum (and still is), he was not involved in the accident - he just didn't want the responsibility so he left town. Pam had two children (as I remember about 4 and 6 years old at the time - also in the accident) who were luckily not so seriously injured. One came out of ity quite well and is a EE. The other had brain damage and has lived in assisted living through a government program. I think it's one of the social security programs) for years. He still lives in a 'home' in Falmouth, KY.
I can't remember where all we got help, but there were several federal and state government programs which we got Pam involved in. One was a program for audio tapes for the blind. Pam's sight was severly affected so this helped quite a lot for the probably 20 years she used it. I can remember how happy she was when a record or a tape would come. I don't know if the program has been cut or is still there.
I believe there was also a government program which helped in rehab - that was practically 10 years of various programs. It was several years before she could walk with a cane and her right leg, hand and elbow are still paralyzed to this day. And it was several years before she could dress herself and bath herself.
It took some time but Pam came around and does pretty well today but it was nearly 10 years before she could live unassisted. That said, I can emphasize. It is a heart wrenching time with a lot of tears and inner agony. I used the word is because things have changed forever. Sometimes when I think of her today - how young she was and everything she has gone through - tears come to my eyes. Very emotional thoughts.
One of the keys for you will be to find a very good lawyer. Don't stay with a lawyer you don't fully trust. Rehab can be long and terribly expensive. The mental anguish is one thing - the financial burden is a potential bombshell.
Maybe someone here knows of a good lawyer in your area.
If you believe it wasn't an accident, write and call your local paper, your mayor, city council people, governor, senators, even major media outlets. Advertise to put pressure on the police. Get your friends and neighbors to help.
John 15:7 If ye abide in me, and my words abide in you, ye shall ask what ye will, and it shall be done unto you.
1 John 3:22 And whatsoever we ask, we receive of him, because we keep his commandments, and do those things that are pleasing in his sight.
Keep the faith. I have a good friend who's daughter was injuried in a traffic accident. She had head injuries and was in a comma for several weeks. After a long stay in the hospital (Children's Hospital of Arkansas), she has recovered with little lingering affect. Be patient, and focus on her recovery.
Cinda. That is shocking news, and I'm so sorry to hear about it. I'm afraid I'm not in a position to help you with any police or legal connections, but I will do what I can: Hope for a speedy and complete recovery. Any parent can understand the pain you must be feeling now, and your tale brought tears to my eyes.
Lucinda, you will indeed have my prayers and lots of moral support. I echo what Marc said...find a lawyer with a solid reputation in family law and don't give up until you have someone you're confident in. This is no time for a wimpy lawyer. Make a stink with the hospital, write letters to the editor, haunt the police. Make yourself memorable. Keep talking to us on the Cove for moral support, because we are ALL solidly on your side.
So sorry to hear of this, Lucinda. The prayer part is and will be done. Otherwise, I feel bad because I cannot offer any other substantive help -- just a few general suggestions. Depending on your financial abilities, a private investigator might be able to help bring the jerk to justice and/or get his name off the next of kin list.
Perhaps speaking "off the record" with a cop or DA who is sympathetic may yield the name of a really good attorney and/or PI -- they know who is good and who is wimpy. And, as others have said, stay on the cops and local DA's office and perhaps get the media involved if possible. The better the attorney the more likely this will happen.