The Elsmar Cove "Humour Thread" - CAUTION - 'Big Kid' Content

[JerryStem]

Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour east of Bakersfield, California, some folks, new to boating, were having a problem. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn't get their brand new 22 ft. Bayliner boat to perform. It wouldn't plane at all, and it was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power was applied. After about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted over to a nearby marina, thinking someone there could tell them what was wrong. A thorough topside check revealed everything in perfect working order. The engine ran fine, the outdrive went up and down, the prop was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard.

REMEMBER, THIS IS A TRUE STORY.....

Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer.

I saw this recently on an episode of MythBusters! They proved it entirely true, and also interviewed someone, I think, that was involved with at least one true instance himself!

Without the trailer it topped out about ~20knots or so, with the trailer it maxed about 2-3knots...

Jerry

 

[Jim Wynne]

You might want to go here where there's more about this, including,



Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour east of Bakersfield, California, a blonde (of course!!), new to boating was having a problem. No matter how hard she tried, she just couldn't get her brand new 22-ft. Bayliner to perform. It wouldn't get on a plane at all, and it was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power she applied.

After about an hour of trying to make it go, she putted over to a nearby marina. Maybe they could tell her what was wrong. A thorough topside check revealed everything was in perfect working order. The engine ran fine, the outdrive went up and down, the prop was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard.

(REMEMBER, this is TRUE) Under the boat, still strapped securely in place was the trailer.

Almost certainly an urban legend, regardless of the Snopes reference to a Bayliner employee telling a similar story.

 

[Greg B]

Tickle me Elmo

A simple misunderstanding
There is a factory in Australia which makes the Tickle Me Elmo toys.
The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arm. A new employee is hired at
the Tickle Me Elmo factory and she reports for her first day promptly at
0800. The next day at 0845 there is a knock at the Personnel Manager's
door.
The Foreman from the assembly line throws open the door and begins to rant
about the new employee. He complains that she is incredibly slow and the
whole line is backing up, putting the entire production line behind
schedule.
The Personnel Manager decides he should see this for himself. So the 2 men
march down to the factory floor. When they get there the line is so backed
up that there are Tickle Me Elmo's all over the factory floor and they're
really beginning to pile up.
At the end of the line stands the new employee surrounded by a mountain of
Tickle Me Elmo's. She has a roll of plush red fabric and a huge bag of small
marbles. The 2 men watch in amazement as she cuts a little piece of fabric,
wraps it around two marbles and begins to carefully sew the little package
between Elmo's legs.
The Personnel Manager bursts into laughter. After several minutes of
hysterics he pulls himself together and approaches the woman.
"I'm sorry,"he says to her, barely able to keep a straight face, "but I
think you misunderstood the instructions I gave you yesterday".
Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles".

 

[Randy Stewart]

This was on Mythbusters a couple weeks ago. They proved it could happen and found out that it actually had happened. Just not like the story however.
A couple of employees had to deliver a boat and for one reason or another (I just don't remember what the program gave as a reason) they drove the boat, trailer and all, to the marina and turned it over to the new owner.

 

[db]

This was on Mythbusters a couple weeks ago. They proved it could happen and found out that it actually had happened. Just not like the story however.
A couple of employees had to deliver a boat and for one reason or another (I just don't remember what the program gave as a reason) they drove the boat, trailer and all, to the marina and turned it over to the new owner.

I take it you are talking about the boat, and not "Tickle-Me Elmo". Although your comments are funnier in context to the Elmo post!

 

[Marc]

While I hate to do this for a few reasons, I have decided to close this thread and start a 'humour' forum. There are a lot of really great jokes and humourous posts here, but for the future I think it will be best to start new threads for individual jokes. No - I won't be actively limiting thread length, but I will try to convince you folks to start a new thread in this forum when you want to put in a new joke or humourous event, etc.

 

[Marc]

Blast from the Past!