What is the most useless {real} documented procedure you've seen?

Ninja

Looking for Reality
Trusted Information Resource
#1
Alright all...a contest...

What is the most useless {real} documented procedure you've seen?

So many auditors on this forum, surely someone has been shown a "how to open the window" or "how to button a labcoat" procedure...

Looking forward to some doozies!:lmao:

A while back I wrote one out of sheer pique on how to use the facility paging system properly...it never got published...
 
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J

joylc

#2
Not a procedure but I think falls within the spirit of your post...

At my previous job, the purchasing department decided that everything that was ordered had to have a material specification, so we had a revision controlled specification for the tampons that were stocked in the ladies restroom.
 

dsheaffe

Involved In Discussions
#3
In the past, where 'everything had to be a procedure', I had seen "How to Write a Procedure" procedure (which I still think I might have on a 3.5" floppy - if only I had a PC that had a floppy disc drive).

A couple of my other favourite procedures were:

"Incoming Mail" - which gave detailed directions on how to get to the Post Office as well as instructions on where to find the post box within the post office.

"Incoming Telephone Calls" - which included a one page flowchart on what to do when you answered the call.
 

normzone

Trusted Information Resource
#4
" "Incoming Telephone Calls" - which included a one page flowchart on what to do when you answered the call. "

Yeah, I've seen that one. When somebody high up wants the customer or potential customer referred to the appropriate sales person in one step, there's a whole algorithm for determining the caller's allegiance and parsing that through which sales territory they fall under.


It's no issue for a veteran working the phones, but throw someone in there cold and the flowchart is handy.

I have seen templates for process documentation and an associated instruction on how to use the template. Pretty silly - if the template is adequately developed then the instructions are in the template.
 
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