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Why men are happier

B

Bill Ryan - 2007

#1
Another one for the ladies (obviously written by one)....

Men Are Just Happier People--
What do you expect from such simple creatures?

* Your last name stays put.
* The garage is all yours.
* Wedding plans take care of themselves.
* Chocolate is just another snack.
* You can be President.
* You can never be pregnant.
* You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
* You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
* Car Mechanics tell you the truth.
* The world is your urinal.
* You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
* You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
* Same work, more pay.
* Wrinkles add character.
* Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.
* People never stare at your chest when you are talking to them.
* The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
* New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
* One mood all the time.
* Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
* You know stuff about tanks.
* A 5 day vacation requires only one suitcase.
* You can open all of your own jars.
* You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
* If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
* Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
* Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
* You almost never have strap problems in public.
* You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
* Everything on your face stays its original color.
* The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe even decades.
* You only have to shave your face and neck.
* You can play with toys all your life.
* Your belly usually hides your big hips.
* One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons.
* You can wear shorts no matter what how your legs look.
* You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
* You have the freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
* You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

No wonder men are happier.
 
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I

IEGeek - 2006

#2
Aww man, I was going to post this. :agree1:

Good humor, no matter what your wedding tackle consists of.

The Hun?

The sad part is that 99.98734% of this is correct.

Funny stuff :biglaugh:
 
J

jmp4429

#3
Ha! No man of mine had ever get any ideas that the garage is all his. In fact, I infringe on all my buddies' garage space.

Also, just because I own 26 pairs of high-heeled shoes doesn't mean I don't know stuff about tanks!

Funny stuff, though.
 
I

IEGeek - 2006

#4
BBQ Cooking - Men and Women

BBQ: A Real Man's Cooking

It's the only type of cooking a real man will do. When a man
volunteers to do the BBQ, the following chain of events are put into
motion:
1) The woman buys the food.
2) The woman makes the salad, vegetables, and dessert.
3) The woman prepares the meat for cooking, places it on a tray along
with the necessary cooking utensils and sauces, and takes it to the man who is lounging beside the grill -- beer in hand.

Here comes the important part ...

4) THE MAN PLACES THE MEAT ON THE GRILL.

then....

5) The woman goes inside to organize the plates and cutlery.
6) The woman comes out to tell the man that the meat is burning. He
thanks her and asks if she will bring another beer while he deals with
the situation.

Important again ..

7) THE MAN TAKES THE MEAT OFF THE GRILL AND HANDS IT TO THE WOMAN.

8) The woman prepares the plates, salad, bread, utensils, napkins,
sauces, and brings them to the table.
9) After eating, the woman clears the table and does the dishes.
And most of all ....

10) Everyone PRAISES the man and THANKS him for his cooking efforts.

11) The man asks the woman how she enjoyed "her night off."

And, upon seeing her annoyed reaction, concludes that there's just no
pleasing some women!
 

Ron Rompen

Trusted Information Resource
#5
Now that's just downright unfair. I would NEVER make my wife work that hard.

Instead of just bringing me ONE beer, I tell her to bring the cooler....that way it saves her a trip.

And people say that us Canadians aren't considerate!

:)
 
T

tarheels4 - 2007

#6
Ron Rompen said:
And people say that us Canadians aren't considerate!
:)
Maybe that is just another misconception about Canadians
 
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